Things I learned… Random Edition

Back from the dead, KG is blessing us with some random things he’s learned in the last few months. There has been a promise that he would give us more later. We’ll see… His thoughts after the jump. And just to be random… “I feel big, not big like weight…” And a bonus song for those that read the list…

THINGS I LEARNED… Random Edition

1. When going camping in Big Bear Mountains, you have to drop deuces in holes. Advice from an experienced novice, make sure you don’t dig the hole near an ant hill.
2. When at the club and the chorus on the song says “ If you got money and you know it…show it… then throw it…” – It is never a good idea to throw all the change you have in your pocket in the air just because you are buying drinks with a debit card that night. True story.
   
3. Just because you’re at Sea World and the animals look nice on TV, that doesn’t mean a dolphin wont give you a dead arm to get you to drop that fish. Punk-ass dolphins, I’m pro-tuna.
   
4. Always try to take a dump AFTER your girl takes a shower. two words – Dutch Oven. We have a steamer here… hahaha. (Not to be confused with a Cleveland steamer.)
   
5. Don’t watch Tropic Thunder with co-workers that you have to be professional with afterwards. Apparently, its not funny to laugh super hard when Downey says “You never go full retard”.
6. Remember to be sharp when those unattractive people hit on you at the company appreciation event. Putting your beer on the ground and walking away quickly does not go over well. Yes, they get the point but you could’ve been more creative… or so I was told.
7. Best quote ever – “You can either be a part of the story or you can read the book and wish you were there.”

Click for possibly the best song title, ever.